On the Road Again

Sober

When we left Roswell, on the trip to Memphis, a stop was made at Starbucks. They had two large expresso fraps that needed a good home.  Deciding to experiment, I took them both.  We tanked APR up on two cheeseburgers from MacDonalds and the fraps.  He had very few problems with directions, handing the trip to Hereford quite well, save for several emergency bathroom stops.

He did okay the next day, from Hereford to Oklahoma City.  I did not stop for food until we reached the outskirts of OKC, where we went to Cracker Barrel.  Sharon met us at the hotel, and visited for ages.  He was great.

The next day, we stopped fairly early for lunch.  I was going to try and make it to Memphis.  By mid-afternoon, it became apparent that we couldn't do it.  Once he ate lunch, he was disoriented much of the afternoon to the point where I stopped in Russellville.

Sharon, who has a husband with Alzheimer's was telling me about travel.  I looked things up and realized we were doing everything wrong.  We needed to travel in short spurts of about 250 miles a day.   

That last day, I followed the recommendations for travel, stopping frequently, keeping him very well fed.  He did great.  Then again, he seems to best when there is something going on, getting lots of attention.  He did fairly well in Memphis.

On the way back home, we left on the 14th, he was tired.  About the time I turned into Russellville, he lost it.  I was afraid he was going to get out of the car while we were driving.  My mother was talking to Floyd.  She had to hang up on him and just start fussing at APR.  He was freaking because he needed to get to a restroom.

We've discovered, when traveling, he would get upset about that.

The following day, he was terrible about directions.  He kept telling me to get off the road so he could find out where we were.  I managed to get him to agree if we went into the welcome center in Oklahoma, and he was told we were o the right road, that he would be quiet.

Forget that.

The next day, we stopped at Fort Reno.  He was very interested.  Then, as it grew later, we had the same problem with directions.  I stopped at a truck stop and got him a map.  He was obsessive with it.  I was going the wrong way.  I needed to go East.  Why was I going the way I was.  It was exhausting and annoying.  He kept fussing that we didn't need to go through Amarillo.  Then, when we were through Amarillo, why haven't we been through Amarillo.

He did not snap out of it until we were in Hondo.




All rights reserved, SJ Reidhead

Peter Cottontail

Palm Beach - 1957

Cathy and Rachel came in for Easter.   One thing that we immediately noticed was how actively APR was following their progress after they left Memphis on Saturday.  He didn't do bad with directions.  Once they arrived, it was quite obvious that something new, a little excitement, and attention is very good for him.  It stirs up the brain a little

I made Easter baskets for everyone.  APR had a blast with his, which was filled with jelly beans, candy corn, wrapped chocolate eggs - the stuff he loves.  When I delivered them on Sunday evening, he was rather irate with the world.  Not really irate, just disgusted because no one bought him any jelly beans.  When he went through his basket, he pounced on his!  Yea, he ate the whole thing.

A few days later, Sadie decided she would eat a few pieces of left-over candy.  She found 3 Godiva truffles in her mother's purse.  Dr. Franklin's office stayed on call all night.  Sadie was okay.

APR kept asking about Cathy and Rachel, how they were doing on their return trip, etc.  He did okay, after they  left.  It was quite obvious having them around helped - greatly.

All rights reserved, SJ Reidhead

Riding Along in My Automobile

APR in 1951 - Just Married!

 What happens when you leave one very bored person in the car while you have your nails and hair done?  Well, if they don't have Alzheimer's and have something to do, they take the car and go run errands.  If you've done this over the years, and really don't have much to do, you go find a friend with whom you can visit.  When you have Alzheimer's and suddenly the car is gone, with you driving it, well, it's a bit scary!

My mother looked up and APR was gone!  The car was gone with him driving it.  The past few months, here in town, two men have gone off like this, one of them ending up dead of exposure after having become disoriented.  My father's sense of direction is shot.  So is his driving judgement.

Naturally, my mother panicked.  I was at the beauty shop myself, so I didn't answer the phone.  Fortunately, the woman who was doing her nails took off, looking for him.  So did my best friend, Josie, who has her shop across the road.  Josie simply told her customers to fend for themselves.

They found him at The Title Company, visiting with the owner, who knows he has Alzheimer's.  The only real damage done was to my mother's nerves.

She was furious with me for now answering the phone.  In her panic, she forgot his phone number.  He had his cell with him the whole time.  I was still having my hair done when she dropped him by to stay with me, while she had another appointment.

He was so funny!
Very proud of himself. 
When he came in, sitting down, he announced, "I guess I'll be eating Kal-Can for awhile."  I told him I'd heard he would be eating it for a month!

Moral of the story:  Never leave a person with Alzheimer's alone in the car with a set of keys!



All rights reserved, SJ Reidhead

Keying the Pick-Up Truck

Parents and Rumsfeld Dec. 28

We were in the ER today for about 3 hours with my mother.  No sign of congestive heart  failure, pneumonia, nothing bad.   They're putting her on steroids for  6 days for her cough.


She has had this miserable cough since November.  Needs to get rid of it.  One reason she's not sleeping well is because she worries so much about APR getting up while she's asleep.  So far, he's doing okay that way.

Still, she worries.....


I am soooo glad we went.  Dr. Whitty (he won't take any of her crap)  gave her a lecture on pain. Said the basic problem is the extreme pain  she is in for her back, fibro, and osteop.  Just let her have it  because she won't take Tylenol, or anything.

Said she's not sleeping because of the pain, which doesn't help her  breathing, which doesn't help her at all!

I felt like doing a na na na na na!  I did do the I TOLD YOU SO.

So, now we start dealing with the pain - I hope.

APR was fuzzy.  I don't know if it is the Alz. or his hearing.  We go  tomorrow to get hearing aids (again).    He's had a rough week.  I  think there is some cognitive slipping.  We're noticing that he's 
eating like a person does when they get old.  Wanting to share, not  taking full portions, leaving food.  It is part of Alz.  But, when  people hit a certain age they do that.  I'm suspecting age.

We're on a playback loop:
Did you pay the taxes?
Yes - I have the receipts.
Where did you get the money?
I used you checking account.
Do I have money in it?
Sure do.
How do you know?
Bank statement and checking it online.
Do you remember the name of the banker I used?
Why...
I want to call and see what I have in my checking account.
I check it online.
Have you paid the real estate taxes?
Yes
And there was enough money to pay them?
Yes
Your mother says we should let you do all the business.
I know, I'm organized and you aren't.
Okay.... and he is satisfied (until tomorrow, when the same question 
is asked)

Other than the money thing, and directions, APR's not bad.  When Dustin was here Thanksgiving, they were out playing with the old pick-up truck.  My father lost the keys.  The other day, he was going outside to "play" with Robert (yard guy).  He went to put on his workshoes - low and behold, there were the keys.

I remembered, when in SC, when he would come in for lunch or something, he would go in through the basement, and leave his wallet, keys on the chess table.  There were times when he would drop them in his shoes so that he would remember them!

We do go through a list of who is and isn't alive.  It is hard on my mother, especially when he keeps asking about his parents and his brother, but I told her she's going to need to get tough about it.  I can say that.  I'm not in her shoes.

So, yes, the taxes have been payed, the check didn't bounce, and I have the receipts!

Loathing the Fear

A Couple of Good Republicans!

There's something we've noticed, lately.  Several of my father's old friends have not been calling. 

When a friend called and asked my mother if APR was able to talk, it dawned on us that people are afraid to face my father and the Alzheimer's. 

The other day, during a phone call, someone asked if he were able to talk on the phone.  Then I explain unless it is late in the afternoon, or he's not sugared up, if you did not know he had Alzheimer's, you wouldn't really now it.

Cathy and I were talking about it today.  Like she says, we are all afraid to face this sort of thing.  We all do it.  You can't blame people for something we all do.

APR does quite well, most of the time.  He wants the keys back, to drive, but he can't.  We've also realized we need to come up with some sort of way to let him handle a limited checking account.  It's so hard at times.

The Miserable Facts of Life

Princess Sadie in Her Christmas Frock

I think it's time we stop fooling ourselves, then again this latest slip is recent.  Like I wrote a few weeks ago, APR was doing great.  He has gone down hill, visibly.  We were at lunch today at Cattle Baron. Heather, who works there, told me she noticed a big change today.  I've not seen him since Sunday, and I see a difference.

We keep making excuses.  He doesn't feel good, has a little bit of the bug going around.  When he says he doesn't feel like eating that vile banana pudding they serve on Cattle Baron's salad bar, I know he isn't feeling good.  He was having spatial difficulties today with his food.  He loves ribs.  I sure wish I ate meat, because they looked fantastic.  Anyone who knows my father, knows he can clean a rib better than a piranha. Heather brought them out, along with the bone plate.  He reached for the little hand wipe, and had a hard time opening it.  My mother had to tell him he didn't need it.  She cut the meat off the ribs, but he didn't eat them.  He didn't touch his potato.  This will then start the battle with her trying to feed him tonight, to get him to eat.    She had tanked him up on a protein shake about 12:30, so that may have made a difference.

This morning he was fairly okay with things.  We can usually discuss the news.  He follows politics quite well.  He was just out of everything.  Couldn't focus. He does the sundowners thing, late in the afternoon.  The other day, he thought my mother was his old girlfriend, Jackie.  He wasn't going to go put on his jammies because he did not think it was proper being in the house with his girlfriend. 

Last Friday the neurologist and hit my mother right between the eyes with what was going on with the disease.  It hit her quit hard.  She had been approaching this with a sense of humor.  Today at lunch she was in tears.  I don't think she realized exactly what was going to happen.  The day before, he was extremely lucid.  They were doing some paperwork.  He was far more with it than she was.  I can't believe the difference in a week.

Maybe it is because he isn't feeling good.  You grasp at straws.  They were to get their B-12 shots today.  It will be interesting to see if that makes a difference.  He's also been using frozen strawberries instead of fresh.  There could be a difference with that, also.

 

Flu You!

Christmas (What Else?)

My mother is down with the flu.  Did meals on wheels.  APR does incredible when he is required to take responsibility!   Very few fuzzies, which is great.  Took him fried chicken.  Told me he needed a soda for the pizza.  My mother looked at him like had Alzheimer's.  He found the frozen pizza I brought him.  My mother said he takes better care of her now that he has Alzheimer's than when he didn't!

Cathy and Laura were here at Christmas.  Both noticed he is better than he was in August.  Like Cathy said, he's doing much better than he was in Feb when they started working on a diagnosis.  The B-12 shots are amazing!

He had problems late in the afternoon, around 5:30, but, once he eats, he comes out of it.  While Cathy was here, he was quite on the mark.  The more excitement, the better he does.  He did chores all day today for my mother.  Called me to tell me she wasn't feeling good.  Just fairly up on things.

Then again, he totally screwed up the gas delivery, but they'd been warned about the Alzheimer's - so he does have his moments.  But - right now, there are far more good moments than bad ones.  Wouldn't it be wild if the B-12 shots actually worked!

Unreliable Sources

Cupie Doll Photo! (Wind storm)

The weather outside has been absolutely frightening for nearly a week!  Today was the first time since last Tuesday that the parents' have left the house. My sister and I have created a no ice policy.  Last Friday morning, APR went out to feed the cats, slipped.  We don't need a broken hip.  When he stays home for more than a few days at a time, he gets bored and cranky.  Today was a cranky day.

We have daily questions/phone calls on the following subjects:

1. Do you have any checks.  I need a few.  (He's not going to get any, either)
2. I need the tax bills so I can look through them.  (They're paid, he's seen them, he's not getting the original - he will lose them - and that's not the Alzheimer's)
3. I need a credit card.  (He maxed his out and I'm trying to pay it down)
4. Why won't you let me drive. (Insurance purposes)
5. Is the checking account overdrawn?  (No, that's why you don't get a check.  The last time he had one he wrote a check of $1800 and told us a week later!)
6. Can I have copies of the tax bills?  (I don't have time to copy them.  The excuse works).
7. I need a check.
8. I need to see the tax bills.
9. What about my credit card.

He has one set of questions he asks me, and another he asks my mother.  I don't think he's started on Cathy.  Other than that, he's doing good.  He's up on the latest news. All in all he's doing fairly well for an 87 year old!

For the people we do business with on a fairly regular basis, we tell them what is going on.  Most people are so nice about it.

Today the constant questions were a little much.  I was trying to do a car-pool thing with Rumsfeld and Doc Holiday.  I was running late. Had to get to the beauty shop.  Had to drive down to Glencoe to pick up mail.  So, I hung up on his, twice.  He was really ticked, told my mother so, twice.

This is so hard for them both.  She is exhausted, quite upset at times.  I'm learning that you need to be a bit cold-blooded.  It's no fun.

ABOUT THE PHOTO:  I showed it to Leroy today on my iPhone.  He thought I was terrible to have taken it.  There was a tremendous amount of wind.  APR was sitting there, looking like a little Cupie Doll. Naturally I had to send a copy of it to my sister.

Just Charge It to My AARP Card!

You Can't Get a Decent Photo of My Mother!

We have noticed a problem with spending.  My father, once the most careful person in the world, now doesn't care what he spends.  Ergo, he is not allowed to have checks.  He has one credit card.  I had my mother take it away from him because he had maxed it.  After a couple months, I'd paid it down a little.  She gave it back to him.  He maxed it in 2 days.  He was told he could keep it in his wallet, but not to use it.

The check book is in hiding.

Every time they go out to eat, he complains that he doesn't have a credit card or a check.  Darn right he doesn't have a check!

This evening the usual argument ensued.  My mother gets upset about it, but either you laugh or cry.  He flipped out his AARP card to give it to the server.  Fortunately, she knew he has Alzheimer's and was very nice about it.  I just shook my head. 

My mother was getting ready to cry.

Then I though about Aunt Eva and the chicken bone.  When my sister and I were little kids, we were visiting in Louisville, at Aunt Eva's house.  She had a little problem going on, tried to get my sister to eat her chicken leg, which had nothing left on it.  Over the years it has become a standard family joke.

Tonight, I thought about that.  Mentioned            it to my mother, who went from dismay to laughter.  It was funny.

What else are you going to do but laugh?

On a rather annoying note, and I should not be annoyed, he calls at least once a day to ask about property taxes. One of our dirty little family secrets is the fact that we had a difficult time catching the Alzheimer's.  One reason is because his basic personality resembles someone with Alzheimer's!  He was always misplacing things.  Property tax time was a nightmare from hell, while he rushed around looking for the bills he tossed aside until the last minute. 

So - every day - he asks about taxes.  I try to be patient.

 

There Ain't No Sanity Clause

Just a Couple a' Republicans!

I come from a very Marxist family - Harpo, Chico, Groucho, and even Zeppo!  One of our family's favorite movies is A Night at the Opera.  The first time I saw it, I laughed until I was crying.

One of the classic scenes in the movie is the discussion between Chico and Groucho about a contract for tenor, Ricardo.  They went through the party of the first part, ripping section after section out of the contract.  Finally they reached the Sanity Clause.  Chico's comment, "There ain't no Sanity Clause," is the stuff comic dreams are made of.

During the past year, the parents have been working on their wills, trust, powers of attorney, medical directive, etc.  About a month ago it came to my attention that it would be a good thing to have a physician sign off on the fact that both parents were 'in their right mind'.  I was a little annoyed at first, as was one of the attorneys they are working with.  But, it needed to be done.  (I will admit one of the reasons I pushed it is due to the research on a book I am doing about dealing with seniors and what their children need to know).

The reaction of their GP was a bit strange.  I was really ticked, thinking he was concerned I was trying to take advantage of the parents.  Come to find out, he'd never even thought of doing something like this, and was also experimenting on it. 

Lo and behold my father did better than my mother!  He ended up answering some of the questions posed to her!  She was quite pleased with that one, so they both passed the sanity clause.

Seriously, there is some evidence that the B-12 injections are working!  They say after 3 months, and the 3rd injection, you will know if they are going to have an effect. 

They are!

We still have problems with directions, and tiring in the evening.  But, the effects are obvious.  On Tuesday, Maggie was telling me she could tell a difference.

He is still furious that he can't drive.  That specific awareness is gone, so there is no way he can drive. He's ticked about that, but all in all,  his disposition is much better.

Maybe there is a Sanity Clause after all!

Food Fight

When I Was A Few Days Old

We have a little problem.  APR wants Worcestershire Sauce on anything with meat!  There are times when he really doesn't want to eat beef unless he has it.  Sergio, at the little Mexican restaurant where we eat has gone so far as to keep a bottle for him.  When we eat at Cattle Baron, Heather automatically produces a bottle.  He always did drown everything in it, so why not be consistent.

Chocolate

Trolling for Candy!

There is a dramatic change in my father when he is all sugared up!  We've discovered when he starts lagging a little, we hit him with some sugar, serious sugar, coffee, this sort of thing, and give him 45 minutes.  He perks up like crazy.

So, my mother decided to get him chocolate. 

That's where the problem is.  Whatever my father eats, Sadie eats.  She's in serious need of a diet, BTW.  If she's not careful, she won't be able to fit into her adorable new pink hoodie.   Well, every time APR hits the candy dish for chocolate, we are terrified he is going to give something to Sadie.  The other day my mother finally put up the chocolate.

He's doing fairly well.  I do think there is a difference with the B-12 shots.  We're having some short term replay, but not bad.  It is surprising how well he is doing.  There are times when he is driving my mother crazy.  She frets, constantly.  At night, he goes around checking all the doors, unlocking them!  I suggested she unlock them, then when he checks them, he locks them.  Last week, she had me take him with me to do some errands.  He wanted to nap while I was in the grocery store.  If she had known, I would have been in trouble.  I get all the way around to the veggies and he comes in, knows where I am, no problems!

I have this terrible feeling we're not giving him enough credit for things.  Jeff McClough warned me about this.  I've been so frantic about other things in life, I've not paid much attention to it.  I must start doing better.

Like a Sugared Up 87 Year Old!

Just Married - 60 Years Ago!

We have been experimenting on my father.  While the word "experimenting" may contain elements of shock - what have we been doing - well, it's not as bad as it sounds.  He's done quite well with our experimentation, actually.

For the past month or so, we've noticed a difference when APR had a breakfast of real oatmeal, sugar, whole milk, and fresh strawberries.  On days he has such a meal, he does quite well. 

We've also noticed when he has a lunch, following breakfast of toast, eggs, and bacon, and the lunch consists of good healthy food for a diabetic, he gets the fuzzies.  The first time we really noticed was in Roswell at Chilis.  He had his favorite Margareta Chicken, black beans, and a dab of rice.  This is a diabetic's dream meal.  Well - within the hour he could not remember where he lived.  He wasn't sure how to get home.  Wasn't even sure what day it was.

Stopping at Starbucks, we tanked him up on a grande strawberries & creme frap.  Within 45 minutes he was great.  He began mentioning if I did not slow down, I was going to miss the turn to the house!

About 2 weeks ago a very dear Christian woman from New Orleans sent me a link to the so called "Alzheimer's Milk Shake" that is being marketed in the UK.  There is one here, that is having mixed results.   The one being marketed here is based on the premise that the Alzheimer's brain does not properly metabolize insulin.  It is not as effective as the one being used in the UK, which is based on food products that are not much different from what he's getting with his morning oatmeal, cinnamon, sugar, whole milk, and fresh strawberries.  It also has a truck load of sugar in it.

Last week, starting on Tuesday, we began experimenting.  On Tuesday, they had an early appointment in Las Cruces.  Breakfast consisted of coffee and toast.  We had lunch at Lorenzo's.  APR had a small salad, Italian dressing, 3 excellent yeast rolls, and eggplant parm on penne pasta.  By the time he had finished the meal, he was getting the directional fuzzies.  We decided to try a dessert on him.  He had chocolate mouse and coffee.  We went from Lorenzo's to Starbucks, to grab an iced tea on the way back up to Ruidoso.  My mother decided to experiment, so she got him the usual strawberries & creme frap.

About thirty minutes later it was like a light flashed on.  He perked up and started remembering numbers, details, dates, locations, stuff he'd not talked about in years!  It was like a sugared up 87 year old!

The next day I learned that my mother had run out of oatmeal.  So, she gave him healthy breakfasts of eggs, bacon, fruit (excluding strawberries). You could actually see him go downhill, to the point where, on Saturday an Sunday he was having hallucinations. 

He was getting desserts.  His blood sugar in the morning would be about 130 or so.

Monday evening she found some oatmeal in the freezer.  Starting on Tuesday morning, he's had oatmeal, whole milk, several tbs of sugar, cinnamon, strawberries, toast, butter and coffee.  He's having dessert, and quite a few sweets.  His morning blood sugar is anywhere from 105-120 or so.  Yesterday, he was doing good.  By today, he was doing very well.

He was great at lunch today.  He had a steak at Cattle Baron.  He did the salad bar, if that's what you call his "salad" which consisted of macaroni something or other, a few carrots, and a marshmallow something.  For dessert he had about a half cup of banana pudding.

About 30 minutes ago he called.  He discussed politics, voting patterns, finances, and mentioned that my mother was annoyed with him, yet again.  She had him sitting on a bench outside the beauty shop.  Glenn Chang, walked down the street for the mail, waved.  He talked about Glenn.  He discussed Obama, and 20 years of oppression under Democrat rule during the Depression until Ike!  While he was doing this he was counting motorcycles.  There's a huge bike rally here.  He said he was counting bikes, had to be nearly a hundred going past while we talked!

What have we learned?

APR requires old fashioned, real, cooked oatmeal in the morning.  My mother is adding cinnamon, sugar, whole milk, fresh strawberries, more sugar, toast, orange juice, butter, and coffee.  I doubt if Michelle Obama would approve of it. Neither would the diabetic associations.  The family care physician's nurse is already on my mother's case because she said strawberries have too high a carb count for a diabetic.

The things we are learning are diametrically opposite to some of the things the official diabetic party line is telling about Alzheimer's.  With APR there is definitely a connection between the amount of actual sugar, the kind Michelle Obama does not want you to have, and the diabetic police say is bad for you - pure refined sugar.  It is what is keeping him from acting like a senior citizen who has a few little problems, and someone who is dealing with Alzheimer's. 

His blood sugar has dropped so much, they've cut his diabetes medication in half. 

I wonder if it's the cinnamon?

There is a moral to this story.  The food police are not always right.  If we were to listen to the party line on what he should be eating, my father would be in very bad shape.

The Day After the Day After

By Sunday Evening, Sadie was Exhausted!

It's over. 

Everyone has gone home, intact.  Rachel's SUV made it back to Memphis in one piece.  Laura's apartment and her cat were not harmed when Irene hit NYC.  My cucumber sandwiches were a disaster.  Other than that, and a few shattered nerves, things went quite well (sort of). 

My mother is exhausted.  She's still in her jammies after two days of rest (we hope). Our real fear was that APR would have this tremendous let-down once the 60th Anniversary celebrations were over.  On the contrary, he is doing great (thus far).  He's quite with it.  There were some shaky moments late Sunday, but not bad at all.  Cathy feared major fuzzies.  He did great! 

60 Years! 

Yesterday he called several times while my mother was napping.  He called today, while she was napping, looking for the car keys.  It was obvious he wanted me to come down to the house after I picked up the mail.  I did.  Sadie was a little down, bouncing off the wall, bored after her admirers left the building, but other than that, things were fine. 

We made a major discovery this weekend.  So far, with this phase of the disease, the more going on around him, the more the intellectual stimulation, the better APR does.  I suspect this may run contrary to popular opinion, which calls for calm.  He does great with a group of people and things going on, the more things, the better.   He did not eat as  well as he should have, but we suspect he may have been grazing a little.  I know on Friday, he and Dustin, according to Dust, were tossing back Ensure shooters!  APR had chocolate and Dustin had strawberry, if anyone is interested in the gory details.

Sadie Slept Through the Photo Opt

On Saturday, Dustin pulled the old Buick, my old powder blue 67 Rivera convertible, out of the shed.  They spent the afternoon tinkering with it.  I have this feeling, as the years progress, Dustin is going to be the one to be able to reach him, through their mutual love of cars.  When I told him, this afternoon, that Dust wants to get the Buick running, and take his grandfather cruising down Route 66, he was so excited.  A light went on in his eyes!  Now he has someone to share his car books with. 

Dustin is going to try to get back in a month or so, to work on the car.  I think it will give APR something to look forward to.  I have a feeling things like that are going to be increasingly important.

APR's Perkins cousins, Jean, Kerry, and Jean's husband Lee, arrived on Friday evening.  They had dinner with us on Saturday, and were in and out Sunday and Monday.  Late Monday evening, APR got a few things mixed up with some stories, but that's okay.  By that time, I don't think any of us were quite with it.

Clueless in Ruidoso (and everywhere else)

Sweet Sadie (She's sleeping, that's why!)

I am ticked and annoyed.  My mother just called.  No, I'm not ticked that she said they were on the way to the ER with my father.  His arms and legs were tingling.  He thought he had a pain in his left arm and chest.  She then called and said they were not going up, but meeting Alicia for lunch. 

I'd read somewhere about tingling in the extremities being a symptom.  I know restless leg is.  I started looking up physical symptoms of Alzheimer's.  Well - try finding a list.  There isn't one.  There are lists of body systems affected.  There is information about behavior.  There is information here and there.  You can find end-stage physical issues, but that's not much good early on, not much good at all.

The list of cognitive symptoms is everywhere. I found an idiotic piece that exercise may delay onset.  That's a total crock.  My mother has kept APR very active.  I can't imagine anyone would be so pathetic and manipulative to try the exercise gambit.  In fact, WebMD's information on Alzheimer's is the least helpful and far less accurate than other sites.  The bottom line is there is no one single list of physical things to watch for - early on.

Early physical symptoms that may appear before the mental symptoms:
Difficulty getting up out of a chair
Difficulty getting out of a car.
Difficulty getting up from a table.
Constant feeling of being cold.
Difficulty walking and maintaining balance.
Changes in urinary habits.
Recognition of scents and odors.
Hand grip

So far, this is my list. I keep looking for additional things.  I think there is a great disservice to people, not to have a list like this.  APR's early symptoms were more physical than cognitive.  If we had known to put these symptoms together with the constantly lost wallet (he was always losing things, so that never bothered us), etc. maybe we could have caught things earlier and saved a heck of a lot of trauma.

I never became truly disturbed until last December when I noticed that he could not do certain math problems the way he once did.  That's when I knew we had a real problem, but never thought of Alzheimer's.  It's quite obvious that we are at the first stage, and have been there for at least a year.

All rights reserved, SJ Reidhead. 

A Fuzzy Day in Roswell Town

Cathy, Sadie & Hondo (who was ticked with Sadie)

Yesterday was a very fuzzy day.  I'm not sure if it is an additional change, but APR's directional problems were worse than usual.  He was okay when we left the house about 12:30.  He napped for about 30 minutes.  When he woke up, as he frequently does when in the car, he did not know quite know where he was.  He knew he was in Roswell. but was a little fuzzy on the directions.  The "usual" questions lasted until we were nearly back at their house.

  1.  My head isn't working right.  Just what road are we on?
  2.  Are you sure you know where we are?
  3.  Just where is our house?
  4.  Are we going back to where we were to pick up our clothes? (he thinks it is a motel)
  5.  Just where are the dogs?
  6.  Is this the right way?
  7.  This road just doesn't look right?
  8.  How many houses to we own in Lincoln County?
  9.  Are we going back to where we were last night?
10.  Are our things safe where they are?
11.  Aren't we going to go pick up our clothes?
12.  Are we going to stay where we've been for the past four nights?

He asked these questions, repeatedly - over and over.  My mother was very good with him, very patient.  I felt sorry for her.  Then again, she learned that someone they know is now in such bad shape with diabetes that he has lost his vision, cannot walk, can barely use his hands and is dealing with dementia.  What is worse, that or Alzheimer's?

One thing we did note that, yesterday he only had a piece of toast and a doughnut for breakfast.  He usually has 2 cups of old fashioned oatmeal (you think my mother would do instant?), toast, fresh fruit, OJ, and coffee.  He ate nothing else until 2:30 and then it was almost all protein.  I got him a Starbucks strawberry & cream frap.  Thirty minutes after digesting the frap, he was his old self.

Is there a connection?

Or - are we hitting another six months problem?

Yesterday evening he was okay.  My mother thinks the problem is that we have traveled so much that he has it on his mind.  He's just not quite clear between here and South Carolina.

Today's he is okay.

The Great Lawnmower Affair

Rumsfeld and His Grandmotehr

One of the very real problems with Alzheimer's is the fact that the judgement sector of the brain eventually is ruined.  One of the earlier signs of this is abject bull-headed stubbornness.  You can't even begin to talk a person out of something they want to do.

My mother experienced this today with the great lawnmower affair.

The front courtyard is a mess.  Thanks to the wonderful rain, grass is rapidly growing.  My father wants it cut.  He wants to cut it himself.  There's no way he can cut it.  He has a hernia.  He is very shaky on his feet.  He's already lost 1.5 toes under a lawnmower.

He has been on this track for two days.  Yesterday Maggie tried talking him out of it.  Every time I've talked to her today, when her back is turned, he heads for the mower.  Also, the moment her back is turned, Sadie grabs one of her stuffed bears and goes behind something so she can pull the stuffings out of it.  When my mother would ask my father not to mow, Sadie would run after him, yapping.

Ray is cutting grass.  I suggested she get Ray to stop cutting on the big mower and go cut the courtyard.  It would make things so much easier.

This stubbornness is an early sign of Alzheimer's. 

Pay attention to it!

The Dog Ate My Hearing Aid and Other Excuses

Sadie, Before the Crime

My father was surfing on one hearing aid.  Several years ago one was lost somewhere between Sierra Vista and Tombstone on a rainy July 2 evening.  He was doing okay until Fred cat-napped the remaining one and did his thing with it.  Last Wednesday we went to Alamo to see what could be done with it.  They were able to repair it!  For free no less!

Well.....

That night Sadie found it.  The following morning, when they were finally able to find the hearing aid, nothing remained of it but some chewed parts. 

So, the Alzheimer's wouldn't be so bad, but he now hears squat!  It is rather humorous.  Today he caught several things wrong.  Just rough. 

This whole thing with the price of hearing aids is so wrong. 

We went to LC yesterday to his urologist.  Got good reports there.  He's still having problems with the planter's wart on his foot, but we take that as it goes.

He is so looking forward to their 60th Anniversary.

No Knife!

Patriotic Sadie!

It looks like there will be no surgery!  The cardiologist nixed it.  "No knife unless there is an emergency!"  That takes care of that!

APR was a little fuzzy on Friday when we went to Las Cruces to the cardiologist.  It was a long, hot day - miserable!  He had directional problems, he was tired.  Did okay on the other things, though.  He was late for his appointment.  He just did not want to get ready to leave.

It took several days for him to catch up and not be so tired. 

We've noticed when he is tired he gets fuzzy.  His directions get bad.  We also learned there is a direct correlation to having a bad evening and not doing well in the mornings.  So, now we know not to plan early morning functions and doctor's appointments. 

Doctors, Diagnosis, and Possible Surgery

APR and Sadie July 1, 2011

My father has had a physical problem that has been getting more and more serious.  We went to LC today for an appointment with the urologist.  The morning, before the parents' left the house, he mentioned that he wondered if he was having a recurrence of a hernia that plagued him 70 some years ago.  Low and behold - he is absolutely correct!

He was a little cranky today at times, but not bad.  When he went into the doctor's exam room, my mother told them that he had Alzheimer's.  According to the nurse practitioner, if she had not mentioned it, they would not have noticed it.  The new medication is working, wonderfully!

The only problem we usually have is directions - and oye!  He never did do directions well.  We won't talk about the last trip to Illinois, and his attempt to read a map (and that was before the Alzheimers!)

I can't get over how well he did this past week during the fire there in the Valley. So far it has burned a little over 100,000 acres, and everyone's nerves - everyone but him.  He's been great, with it, following the storyline, keeping up, the whole nine yards.

We must keep remembering that we are living on "borrowed time".

Fire Near the Parents' Home

They say the fire has been put "to bed" until tomorrow. Tomorrow afternoon is going to be crunch time. Alicia is spending the night with the parents tonight. I'll go back down in the morning. Alicia and Scott have taken almost all the pictures off the wall. The parents' car is loaded with the usual things. Tomorrow, if it looks like the fire is getting closer, I'll get the old photos and things into the Durango. I also need to line up a truck and some people to help move the antiques out of the house to safety.

Evidently this was not to happen.

My mother's friend, Rosa, lies about a block or so from where the fire broke down the canyon. I felt like a jerk pulling up in the Hondo Post Office parking lot (like every other yahoo taking photos). I saw her house, and just called my mother, "Start praying for Rosa!". I gather her house is okay.

This evening The Pink Flamingo had a call about 8:30PM that all you know what was breaking lose. Thanks to Josie and James, I finally realized that it was the inferno. Scott, Alicia, and Sydney beat me down to the house. I knew Maggie was there, so I went on down to Hondo to see what was going on. (local radio report)


Somehow the fire managed to gut Alamo Canyon, where my parents have 2000 acres for sale. I guess it's a fire sale now! It started to cross the Rio Hondo (nothing in it right now - unfortunately) right near the Hondo School where they were evacuating everyone!


If you listen to the radio clip, you will learn that the fire line jump was a total shock. When I talked to Jennifer Myslivy, PIO, for the fire fighting team, this was not in the cards. I talked to her about an hour before this happened.


Earlier in the day, the third lightning strike fire merged, creating something like a 50,000+ acre monster. Hondo is about 5 miles or so from the parents' house. They are between the river and Hwy 70. The fire has not topped the ridge behind them, where they are. There is a nice rosy glow. As I left home, I saw where it had topped the ridge between San Patricio and Glencoe.


With luck, some time tomorrow, their yard will turn pink from slurry. One good thing is the parents' get their irrigation water (if there is any) tomorrow morning. If it can flood the orchard, that will help, even more.

We need some prayer -
Firefighters
Rain
Homes will be saved
And - for my parents

About midnight, after Alicia and Scott left, my father was starting to get "fuzzy" as I call it. He was tired. He did not quite focus on what was happening. If they lose the house, he will not survive. I don't know how well my mother will do. He's now 87, with a little asthma. The medication for Alzheimer's is working quite well, but I don't know how well he can handle a disaster. My poor mother is exhausted. She has a very serious heart condition. Neither one of them need to be outside.

Funny thing, the smoke seems to be worse here in town.

This is turning to a monster fire. All the media can focus on is Los Alamos. There are those who suspect all the good resources are up north, fighting that fire, because all the media is there. They are sending out messages from Los Alamos constantly - but ignoring what is going on here.

Why Do People Think Alzheimer's Is So Dirty?

APR and B-2 Day Before He Turned 87

I was talking to my mother today.  She has started telling people about my father's Alzheimer's Disease.  The more you talk about it, the more obvious it becomes that some people just look askew at it.  Like she said, "Why do people think it is almost dirty?"

They don't get that way about cancer.

We were on something of a playback loop this morning. 
Have the taxes been paid?
What is the checking account balance?
Did you pick up the mail?
What about the insurance?  (He remembers that Glen is our insurance agent).
What about the real estate taxes?
Have they been paid?
Did you pick up the mail?

We finally get through that - it takes a good 15 minutes.  Then it is all about the house in Hondo.  He needs to get it straight.  Is that where they are going to be living?  What about that other house in Ruidoso?  I tell him there was no other house, and yes, that is where they are going to be living.  That's good.  Hondo likes it there.

My mother said she is now telling him everything to do.  I made a smart remark that she always did, so what's new with that? 

I Swear the Cat Has His Paw in the Phone Book Under Pawn Shops!

From now on, everything is bittersweet.  I have had the very good fortune and abject misfortune to know that this is our last real Father's Day.  I sadly know what is coming and I have had the good fortune of being able to have a few very good hours on a day that will never really be - again.  We have no idea how far along APR will be next  year.  Because of this knowledge, we are profoundly blessed by the realization that this is it.

APR, Dustin, and B-2

My cousin, Linda, was not that fortunate on Mother's Day.  She had no idea that her mother, my mother's older sister, would not even make it another month.  I honestly don't know which is worse, knowing what is to come, or what Linda faced. 

Intellectually, I know it is never going to be as good as it was today.  We may get lucky.  The meds may work for awhile, but it is only "borrowed time" nothing more.

There was only one crises today.  The wind has been blowing so hard, it was creating havoc with the new swing.  APR went out and figured out how to keep it from being blown away, so that was a very good thing!

Many of the passages of our lives have been passed eating Chinese food.  Today was no exception.  We had lunch at the Great Wall.  The owners, Ryan, Nana, and Glenn are more like family that most members of our family!  I took APR his bag of cowboy books Cathy and were giving him.  He had some cards in the bag (from the cats).

We had nearly finished lunch when Glenn came in.  We talked for awhile.  My father told Glenn about Fred stealing his hearing aid.  I did not know that Fred had stolen his gold watch awhile back, hiding it in a cache in the garage!  So, my father tells Glenn that he noticed that Fred was learning how to read the phone book, and caught him with his paw on the page with the pawn shops!

That was so good!

Feeding Time at the Parents' Cat House - Fred at Top of Photo

He's a little foggy this evening, but then again it's called "Sundowning".  We went through the usual about location, where I am, where they are, and where he lives.  That's okay.  He knows it is Father's Day, and had a very good day.

Isn't that all that really matters?

Even though he had the directions about where he was living all mixed up, he knew exactly where Sierra Vista was.  I told him about the huge fire.  He knew where Hwy 92 was.  I described where it had begun on the Mexican side of the border.  He knew where the mountains were.  I told him the fire had crossed the road and was heading toward Hereford.  It was pushing toward the Mall and the base.  He mentioned that it was at least 15-20 miles from Tombstone.  He's just not sure about Lincoln County and Hondo. 

That's life, isn't it?

My mother said that she and Betty Mason were talking today after church.  Betty told her she did not understand why people were so ashamed of Alzheimer's and dementia. 

Why is that?

My mother is coming to grips with things.  She said when she finally decided to face what was going on and fully admit it, she is feeling better.   I think she's finally starting to sleep better. 

You face it.  You don't hide what is going on.  You don't hide the person you love.  It is like cancer.  You don't hide that. 

I feel sorry for people who won't allow themselves to accept that someone in their family has an illness that is eventually terminal.  It is not going to be pretty, but it is life.  My parents have friends and neighbors who are doing just this.  They are locking themselves away from the world. 

Maybe that is even worse than the blasted disease itself.

What? I Can't Hear a Thing on This Phone!

APR and Rumsfeld

Those who haven't seen APR in a week have noticed the difference.  Like a friend said, "He's almost his old self!"  Yea, right, complete with the cat stealing his remaining hearing aid.  Even though the meds are working, wonderfully, he can't hear a damn thing, which makes him sound like he has Alzheimer's!

This afternoon, about 3PM or so, a fast moving wild fire broke out in a forested subdivision about 2 miles from me.  We were going to meet at Cattle Baron for early dinner al la Seinfeld (an old episode).  By the time I went to the post office, and stopped at the laundry, they were announcing evacuations and highway closures.

I call the parents.  My father's words are in the regular text color.  Mine are in Red.

"Are you there yet?"
"Where are you?"
"Does your mother have time to get the car washed?"
"There is a fire..."
"She will be there in less than five minutes."
"There is a bad fire..."
"You are already there?  She said she would be there in about five minutes.  There is a fire?  Does your mother have time to get the car washed before you meet us?"  I hear him tell my mother I will be there in three minutes!

(I am not kidding - this was the conversation).

"They are starting to evacuate along 70.  You need to meet me at Jorges."
"Why are they evacuating?  Oh, there's a fire?  Is Champion's Run on fire?  Where are you?  We're getting the car washed!"
"May I please speak to my mother?"
"Why?  She's driving.  She's going to get the car washed and meet you for dinner.  Are you there yet?"
"There is a fire."
"What wire?"
"The fire is behind K-Bobs."
"We're meeting her at K-Bob's for dinner."
"They've evacuated K-Bobs.  That is where the fire is."
"What wire?  I thought we were going to Cattle Baron, but now we're going to K-Bobs.  Your mother doesn't like K-Bobs."

He finally gives the phone to my mother.  I explain about the possibility of highway closures and evacuations.  I told her where we needed to meet.  I hear my father, "Why?  What fire?  I don't see any fire?"

About 5 minutes later I have made my way through town.  By the time I reached Schoolhouse Park, "traffic" (if you can call it that) has begun to back up.  The smoke looks horrible, blowing toward the condos where I live.  I hear on the radio that they were evacuating down to the Track.  Jorges was being evacuated.  Walmart was being evacuated!

I call the parents.

My father answers.  "What's going on?"  (I swear he said that).  "Are you meeting us for dinner?"
"They're evacuating down to Walmart.  You need just to get through the "Y" and head home."
"Why?  We aren't having dinner?"

SJFR and Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reid

"There is a huge fire.  At least one home has burned."
"I don't see any fire.  Say, are you hungry?  Where are we going for dinner?  What?  What wire?  Where are you?"
"I'm being forced to turn.  There are a bunch of back roads..."
"Why are you on back roads?  Did you know there is a fire!  You said something about a fire, but the cat ate my hearing aid.  Where are you?  Are you being evacuated?"
"I need to talk to my mother."
"She's driving.  The traffic is terrible.  Why do  you need to talk to her?  What?  Where are we meeting you?  Who is being evacuated?  You said the church is on fire?"

Josie called then called.  I hung up on the parents.  I had to hang up on her and curse a little as I was instructed to turn off Suddreth.  I ended up driving around the Middle School, toward Sonic.  I call the parents, again...!

"Where are you?"
"We're near the health food store.  I can't  hear you at all."
"I told you to head to the Downs."
"Your mother wanted to get the car washed.  We're coming.  I can't hear you!"
"They are closing off the entrance to the hospital."
"Why, is the church on fire?  The fire hasn't spread to the Downs has it?  Why do you need to talk to your mother?"
"I need to tell her which road to take."
"She's going to the Downs."
"They have closed the roads."
"Yes, we're on the road.  Where are you?"

As I drove down on of the roads that led to the Sonic, I noticed that the fire appeared to be so close to the Presbyterian Church that it was going to go up in flames.  I did not have a camera to get a shot of one of the planes dropping slurry.   The phone rings.

"Where are you now?"
"I am trying to make my way home.  They are sending everything over to 70.  Take the road by the church."
"We're behind Walgreens.  What road do we take?  You said the church is on fire?  I can't hear you on this phone!"
"It looked like the Presbyterian church was on fire."
"The church is on fire?  It doesn't look like the fire is near it.  Where are you?  We're at Walgreens, all turned around."
"Tell my mother to go back up to the church and turn town 70."
"How can she?  She's lost.  Where are you?  I can't hear you at all."

Rumsfeld

Thank goodness Josie called so I could hang up on them.  I was talking to Josie when I drove into my condo.  She told me if I did not hear from them to tell my mother to pull over and she would come find them.  About that time they pulled up behind me in the parking lot where I live!

My mother was clutching the mail to her chest.  The wind was horrific.  My father had a box from Shadow (my seamstress) in his hands.  I asked them to leave everything in their car.  If I had to evacuate, quickly, then I would have something to wear.

I asked them to evacuate Rumsfeld.  If he were not here, and I needed to catch the cats, then it would be much easier.  We had to argue with my father over that, the package, and the mail.

Oye!

Rumsfeld is quite happy being evacuated, playing with Sadie.  The fire is contained.  Unfortunately nine homes were burned.  There are a lot of people out there who need prayer, including a mama bear and a set of twins who were lost in the fire.

The New Meds May Be Working!

APR, Cathy, Dustin & The New Grill

On Saturday my father turned 87.  He had a good day.  About 35 people or so showed up for his party, which went quite well.  He gave tours of his little white elephant.  All in all, he had a great time.  By the end of the evening, Sadie was exhausted!

The new medication appears to be working!

He started taking it Monday evening.  By Thursday, I could see a difference.  He still gets fuzzy when he is tired, but I think there is a huge difference.  I've heard if it works, it works, and quick.  If it doesn't, then that's about it.  Pat Huckins calls it "borrowed time."

Cathy, Dustin, and Laura left yesterday.  They took a U-Haul with quite a bit of furniture.  My mother crashed after they left, and spent much of the afternoon sleeping.  APR called, told me he was going to start up his little white truck and take it to the orchard, and spend a couple hours watering his apple trees.  He did, evidently reading a cowboy book in the process.

For his birthday, besides the new BBQ and the swing, we gave him a bag of cowboy books.  He's been reading them, quickly.  The best part, today when I went down to take some Meow Mix on an errand of mercy, he discussed the topic of the book with me!

I am using the cowboy books as my measure of how far he is with this horrid disease.  As long as he is reading,  we know he's still himself.  I know it is only a matter of time before he won't be able to read.  It breaks my heart.

On Friday, when he fired up his new grill, I found myself thinking that this was his last new grill.  I have realized I cannot allow myself to think about this. 

SCENES FROM THE BIRTHDAY PARTY

Rumsfeld's Godmother Willa, Grabbed the Swing!

The New Swing Was Quite Popular

Glenn and Alicia

Not Bad for 87 Years Old!

Sadie and Rumsfeld Partying!